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Fear is a Friend Who’s Misunderstood

Fear is a Friend Who’s Misunderstood

I was listening to the radio the other day, and a John Mayer song came on. I was struck by one line in the song: fear is a friend who’s misunderstood. I don’t usually get huge psychological insights from John Mayer, but I thought this line was particularly deep. I...
6 Strategies to Interpret Your Dreams

6 Strategies to Interpret Your Dreams

Dreams can be fascinating. In the past, psychologists were really into interpreting dreams. Some people claimed they could tell you exactly what your dream meant. They even had guidebooks that associated dream content with various meanings. I think it can be helpful...
What Can We Learn From Negative Emotions?

What Can We Learn From Negative Emotions?

Usually when people come to counseling, they are in emotional distress. If you are struggling, you might be in that place right now. Maybe you feel depressed, down, and sad. Or perhaps you feel anxious, uptight, and nervous. You want relief from the unpleasant...
Give Your Unconscious Some Time to Work It Out

Give Your Unconscious Some Time to Work It Out

I remember one day, I was struggling with a writing project. I was working on a section of a book, and I was stuck. I didn’t really have a clear direction for where I was going, and I didn’t know what I wanted to say. So, as you might expect, I was making very little...
It’s Okay to Be Sad

It’s Okay to Be Sad

The other day, I was aware of feeling really sad. Nothing terrible happened—some of my issues were getting triggered and I was dealing with that. I knew I wouldn’t feel that way forever, but for the day, I was feeling pretty down. I attended a group discussion that...
3 Ways to Deal with Emotions

3 Ways to Deal with Emotions

Emotions are a huge part of our daily lives. Our feelings let us know we are alive, and they help us to connect with others. Emotions are also important indicators of our needs. For example, if we feel angry, we might need to set a boundary or stop an injustice. If we...
The Need to Control (And Getting Scared)

The Need to Control (And Getting Scared)

Sometimes I feel the need to control everything about my life, including the people I’m in relationship with. I experienced this the other day. I was working on a project that involved coordination from a bunch of different people. I needed to get some paperwork from...
Emotions and Needs

Emotions and Needs

Sometimes I struggle to identify my emotions and talk about them. For example, the other day, I was frustrated. I was grumpy with a colleague at work, and I didn’t really know why. Frustrated isn’t really an emotion, so I spent some time trying to figure out what...
How to Know What You’re Feeling (And Talk About It)

How to Know What You’re Feeling (And Talk About It)

Sometimes it’s difficult to identify your feelings and talk about them. I think it can be especially tough for men. I think part of the reason is that some of us just didn’t grow up in environments where people were open about their feelings. Maybe you grew up in a...
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