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The Problem with Anticipating Pain

The Problem with Anticipating Pain

I’ve been getting in a bad habit of anticipating pain. Here’s what I mean: Let’s say I’m entering a situation that is uncertain, or has the possibility for pain. I’m focusing on the possibility of pain at some point in the future, and it’s making me feel crappy in the...
Look Fear in the Face (And Don’t Back Down)

Look Fear in the Face (And Don’t Back Down)

One of my favorite movies is the Godfather. My favorite scene happens near the beginning of the film. Vito Corleone (the Godfather) is recovering in a hospital from an assassination attempt. Michael Corleone (his youngest son) goes to visit him, but when he notices...
Ski for the Spaces

Ski for the Spaces

A competitive skier was doing an interview about how he navigated skiing through the trees. Skiing through the trees can be very dangerous. In fact, one of the most common ways that people die when skiing is by hitting a tree. But this guy actually skies into the...
Move Toward Your Anxiety

Move Toward Your Anxiety

Anxiety is a powerful emotion. If you struggle with anxiety, you know what I’m talking about. Maybe you have racing thoughts, and have trouble settling down. Or maybe your heart starts to beat faster, and you feel stressed out. Maybe you struggle to fall asleep...
Life is Negotiation: Drop the Fear

Life is Negotiation: Drop the Fear

Sometimes in my life, I shy away from negotiation. It makes me feel uncomfortable. I don’t like to make the other person feel bad. Sometimes I don’t even know what I want or what my position is. Here’s the problem: When I shy away from negotiation, I don’t get my...
When Adversity Hits, Staying Calm is a Superpower

When Adversity Hits, Staying Calm is a Superpower

I recently saw the movie Vice, which chronicles the political life of former Vice President Dick Cheney. What struck me the most about the film was Cheney’s ability to remain remarkably calm in the face of adversity. Heart Attack One scene stood out to me. Cheney is...
When in Doubt, Reach Out

When in Doubt, Reach Out

My wife and I had another couple over for dinner not too long ago, and we had a great time. It was someone I had met at church. I didn’t know them very well. But we had a good conversation at church, and I thought they might have “friend potential.” So, I reached out...
The Year of Yes

The Year of Yes

I have been realizing lately in my life that I say “No” more often than I say “Yes.” Fear and Protection I think my tendency to say no has a lot to do with fear. I want to protect myself. I want to stay safe. I don’t want to get hurt. Although...